Shiloh vs. Zahara*

Okay, if you have no idea what the title of this post means and if you don't recognize the adorable kids pictured above, you should probably just stop reading now. The five minutes you'll spend reading this inanity are five minutes you'll never get back. Trust me.

For those of you who are on a first-name basis with the Jolie-Pitt brood, please check out this recent "news" item on UsMagazine.com, Which Jolie-Pitt Has the Best Style: Shiloh or Zahara?

A few things here:

1. The writer who pitched and then wrote this idea pretty much reserved themselves a spot in Hades. I mean these kids are three and four years old! Do you really need to be pitting them against each other like mini-CW starlets?

2. Who actually takes the time to comment on "news" articles like this? Okay, so I'm totally guilty of serial blog commenting, but at least that's reserved for people I sort of know. I can't imagine having something so burning to say about the Jolie-Pitt kids that I'd actually feel compelled to share my thoughts with fellow US Magazine junkies.

Which brings me to my third and final point....

3. The comments are BY FAR the most entertaining part of this whole affair. Some of our favorites:

• From SKHG, (who may or may not be Roy Ashburn secretly commenting on his iPhone from an Abercrombie dressing room.) "I really hope Shiloh's not part of their plan to help the gays. I wouldn't doubt it one bit! They seem to be pushing something that started out as cute and funny. Being the strange people they are, I guess anything's possible." [LiLa commentary: Laura - Who says "gays" in a non-ironic context? Lisa - Bat shit crazy people.]

• From B, "Is anyone else concerned about Shiloh? Why does she look like a boy?!?" [LiLa commentary: In a word: yes. We are concerned about Shiloh, B. But not concerned enough to leave a comment about it on UsMagazine.com. Oh no...we'll post an entire blog about it instead. Yeah, we like to take the high road.]

• From Real, "whats with all you people downing on a girl who doesnt need to be girly? I think her hair is a refreshing change. there are too many long locked mini princesses already." [LiLa commentary: We hear ya, Real. It does seem a little bit excessive, no? Although, I've got a three-year-old and she really isn't capable of deciding her own style just yet. In fact, I dress her like I would like to dress myself if I were two feet tall and under 30 pounds. Something tells me there might be a little bit of that going on here.]

• From They Are Both Prettier Than Maniston Ever Was, "To the Maniston weirdo who is bashing St. Angelina's kids - Maniston was never a cute kid. Her own mother wrote a book about how fugly she was growing up. Angie's kids are all beautiful." [LiLa commentary: Wow. Who knew people still really cared about the whole Jen vs. Angelina thing. I mean, no offense TABPTMEW, but isn't that whole debate so 2005? I mean, clearly Angelina won the battle, she got the guy and the career. Poor Jen has really amazing hair but hasn't been in a decent flick since her marriage collapsed. I think the whole "Maniston" nickname might be a little excessive. Why kick a girl when she's down?]

Well, there's your weekly dose of pop culture. Personally, as writers, we're SUPER excited for the inevitable tell-all books that will be published by these two in twenty years. I'll be first in line to pick up a copy of CONFUSED: MY LIFE DRESSED AS A SMALL PREPUBESCENT BOY by Shiloh Jolie-Pitt, although I'll be even more excited to read DADDY DEAREST: MY LIFE WITH A MAN WHO HATED WIRE HANGERS MORE THAN MY MOTHER HATED MANISTON by Zahara Jolie-Pitt.

Good times.

*Please note this post may be considered offensive if you are sensitive to tomboy preschoolers, anti-gay senators or if you are a frequent Abercrombie and Fitch shopper and a card carrying member of Team (M)Aniston.