After five straight days of editing things inevitably start to fall apart. Our children start to hate us, our houses look like someone bombed them with toys and cookie crumbs and our yoga pants start to develop a very distinct odor. Life isn't pretty in LiLa land at this stage of the game and it's usually right around this time where we start to turn on each other...
Lisa: There's something wrong with the big reveals. They don't feel big.
Laura: *silence*
Lisa: Hello? Are you there? The book sucks. It's not working.
Laura: We can't do anything about it. Maybe they're not reveals anymore, more like putting puzzle pieces together. It's still totally satisfying.
Lisa: *silence*
Laura: Did you hear me?
Lisa: Yeah, I heard you, I just think it's stupid.
[Kids begin wrestling and screaming at the top of their lungs for ice cream. Lisa locks herself in the nearest closet.]
Laura: Well, fixing that particular issue would require rewriting the entire book. We'd have to change alliances, destroy friendships.
Lisa: What's that noise? Are you crying or did you just turn on Strawberry Shortcake again for Lydia?
Laura: *sniffles* Both.
Lisa: Pull it together. [Sounds of battling children escalate to the point where there's a 50/50 chance that the neighbors have already called child services.] I gotta go.
Laura: Whatever.
20 minutes later....
Laura: I've got it! We can tone down the flashback, make it less obvious. Then it's still a surprise.
Lisa: Holy shit. That totally works. You're a genius.
Laura: I know.
Lisa: I love you.
Laura: I know.
Lisa: Also I'm 99% sure Ken is going to divorce me by the time this book hits the shelves.
Laura: You are not moving in with me.
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Don't call this a comeback
So it’s been a minute. Or 10. Or truthfully more like 2,102,400. At least we think that’s how many minutes there are in 3 years, but let...
31 comments:
You guys are awesome. If only it were that easy.
You guys are so cute. It's so nice you get to bounce ideas back and forth to one another. I have these same conversations -- in my head. They really make me nervous when I start yelling at myself in the supermarket.
Piedmont Writer -- That is so me! Thank heavens I am not the only writer caught berating myself out loud in public!
Lisa and Laura, you are so lucky to have a plausible excuse.
This sounds like so much fun!! Katie and I have got to get back to our collaborative screenplay.
sf
I feel this way when I'm not editing and I'm by myself:/
Aw, it's awesome that you guys worked it out.
LOL Hope your sanity is intact when you make it out of revisions! :)
So with you two. I have these conversations with my dog (happy to say that most of the time, I don't think I hear him answer), which is a little different, but that certain smell in the house of re-microwaved leftovers and unwashed laundry, and the questionable dynamics with my family, those parts are TOO TRUE. Revision--argh!!!
Ha ha you gals crack me up. You make editing seem to easy.
At least you have Strawberry shortcake for background noise. I am subjected to the Saddle Club. Seriously, have you ever listened to them whine??? Ugh!
Ha, ha! I collaborate too. But not with a sister. So, it isn't as much fun.
If your novels are as much as fun/interesting to read as your true stories, I'm sure your edits are going in the right direction. Hooray for "how to fix it" revelations. Hang in there.
That almost makes me wish I had a collaborater to help me. ;) You girls are too funny.
Can I come move in with you guys? (Yeah, I know you don't live together in a big house full of writing (and wild kids) but in my mind you do.
I am really struggling with the if-I-change-this-then-it-changes-everything dynamic.
It is HARD. (Maybe the hardest thing about writing....)
Shelley
You two totally qualify for your own reality show. Since you've mastered YouTube videos as of late with WriteOnCon and all, I think you should put out some clips and put this out there in the visual sense. Freakin' hysterical!
Marissa
The joys of editing! :)
I love this glimpse into editing. And to think some of us suffer through this ALONE. Dude, I need a writing partner, stat.
<3 Good luck with the edits!
This made me smile. Hang in there, you guys. It's almost over.
Well. At least you love each other. There's always that.
Keep at it. Eat lots of ice cream and Twizzlers. It'll get there.
ha ha. that was fun to read. im glad you guys get along and love each other and could settle out how to fix your book. i like happy endings. well maybe getting divorced isnt so happy.
Oh, I'm envious. I'd love to have someone to bat around ideas and question my writing with other than my Yorkie. She loves everything I write. Hang in there. When you're finished the book will be great!
Love it. Also makes me fear parenthood.
Awww... maybe my sister should be my writing partner... at least I'd know she'd still love me even if she wanted to kill me. :)
LOLOLOLOL.
That was awesome. I have had that same freakin' conversation!
Only I was alone which makes it a little disturbing.
I love these peeks into collaborative writing. Alz and I just IM random ideas at each other in furious spurts until something sticks.
Glad I don't work with my sister in the writing sphere. She intimidates me enough on a regular basis.
LOL! I love the way you guys work things out. =)
LOl! You guys are great! : )
You guys are so fun! I'm sure Ken will still be there after your book comes out. :)
I wonder what it's like to be one of your kids.
Lol. Good blog entry. I couldn't imagine collaborating with my sister, when we were younger we couldn't even play chess together without falling out.
See, what cracks me up is that I have these same conversations during revisions. Both voices are just in my head.
See, you two get to have this conversation with each other. Like, two actual human beings discussing things. I have these kinds of conversations with myself. Which makes me feel a bit schizophrenic. (I'm not schizophrenic, incidentally. Yes, I am. No, I'm totally not. Er... yes, I am.)
What?
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