Do You (Nancy) Drew?

Nancy Drew is turning 80 this week and we just had to take a minute to wish her happy birthday. Chances are if you're a girl and you read a lot growing up, you're well versed in all things Nancy.

Personally, my first brush with the divine Ms. Drew was born out of sheer boredom. I was at my Grandmother's house and I had finished The Babysitter's Club #3,210 Logan Stalks Mary Ann* and I had nothing to do. Enter my Grandmother's dusty bookshelves lined with my mom's old Nancy Drew books. The girl on the cover looked pretty cool in a retro kind of way. And the cover looked slightly mysterious and maybe even a tiny bit scary to my 9-year-old eyes, so it was really a no brainer. I cracked the book open and started reading.

And I didn't stop. I made my way through all of my mom's old books and then started buying the newer ones at the store.

Nancy was my first mystery and she was the first heroine I remember reading about that had some real girl power. She had her own car, her own friends and she always cracked the case. Ned was cool too, but he was more like an accessory than a boyfriend, which in retrospect was actually kind of awesome.

Naturally, when we set out to write a mystery for tween and teen girls, Nancy Drew was the first heroine to come to mind. When we had a vision of a modern day Nancy, rocking (longer) pearls (they're SO much more versatile from a fashion perspective) and solving mysteries with a wicked sense of humor, Kate Lowry was born. Of course Kate being both self-aware and sarcastic is all too aware of her Nancy Drew like tendencies, so LIAR SOCIETY is full of her irreverent Nancy-isms.

To celebrate Nancy's birthday we thought it only fitting to share Kate's very first Nancy-ism. Our snarky sleuth has just received an e-mail from her dead best friend and has taken it upon herself to crack the case:

That e-mail had somehow transformed me into Nancy-effing-Drew and it was borderline ridiculous. I remembered devouring those books as a kid, positive that one day I’d grow up to be a kickass detective just like her. And here I am. Nancy Drew version 2.0. I wonder if Nancy had to pop Prozac to take the edge off too? Probably not. Just goes to show, remakes are never as good as the original.

Now it's your turn: Which fictional characters have inspired you? Head over to the comments and paste a little something that demonstrates how they've impacted your writing if you're in the mood to share.

Have a fabulous weekend everyone and be sure to stop back on Monday for a brand new vlog and a contest for a signed copy of one of our all-time favorite books.

P.S.
HUGE thanks to Loretta Nyhan for letting us know about Nancy's big b-day. Do yourselves a favor and go follow her blog. She's the next Sarah Dessen and quite possibly one of the smartest (and funniest) people we know.

*Fine, that's totally not a real title, but did anyone else find Logan creepy? And Mary Ann was so freaking boring. How did she have a boyfriend while rockin' Claudia was stuck closet eating her feelings?

To Read or Not to Read (Book Reviews), THAT is the Question

Really interesting #yalitchat last night about critiques, editors and book reviews. We've heard a number of authors say that they refuse to read any reviews of their book. It's just too much of a roller coaster for them to read 'em. Some people love it, some people hate it. After all, the only thing that really matters is how many people are buying your book. Good, bad or indifferent, money talks.

Oh, but how do you not read what people are saying about your work? I mean, I can't imagine not sifting through every single inane comment about LIAR SOCIETY. Painful or not, I would just want to know. (For the record, somehow we've already got 4.3 stars on Goodreads from three readers. Unfortunately, none of them have actually read the book. So guess that shows you how much stock you can put in some reviews...)

Of course if you're an amazing author like Dianne Salerni (WE HEAR THE DEAD is out now! Do you have your copy?) with a kickass review from Kirkus, I guess maybe this really isn't a debate.

Or if you've written an incredible book like PICTURE THE DEAD (yeah, we're looking at you Lisa Brown and Adele Griffin) that's racking up glowing reviews all over the interwebs, it's probably super fun to see what the critics and readers are saying about you and your writing.

What about you guys? Would you have the willpower to avoid reviews completely or are you crazy OCD masochists like us? Tell us what you really think in the comments.

WTF Wednesday*

Just a few things that have made us say WTF this week:

• They're selling a knock off of Bella's engagement ring? SERIOUSLY? I can't imagine the poor guys that are getting down on one knee with that bad boy in hand. Ouch.

• No new Lost this week? WTF!?!? It's the last freaking season. Isn't there a law against airing repeats when there's only like 5 episodes left of the show?

• The Hills Then and Now. To celebrate the (hopefully) final installment of The Hills, the kind people at Yahoo have put together a slideshow with side by side pics of the cast in their first season and their last. I see this and mourn the loss of Heidi's old face. WTF Heidi? For the love of God, why did you destroy yourself with so much plastic surgery. And the other cast members have certainly spent their fair share of time under the knife. I think the only person who actually looks better is Audrina and that's mainly because the doctors somehow figured out a way to fix her wonky eyes. She still has that creepy vacant stare, but at least she's now capable of making eye contact.

• Ommmm....WTF? Today at the gym, I practically tripped over some girl who was practicing yoga outside of the classroom. She was following along with the instructor (who was teaching a half-empty class) and taking up valuable ab workout space. Plus, whenever anyone new practically tripped over her as well, she'd say, "I'm just doing yoga, out here." WTF crazy-lady? Sh*t or get off the pot and get out of my way, I'm trying to do crunches.

• First you create GOOP, possibly the most useless and unintentionally funny celebrity newsletter EVER and now you're trying to convince us that you struggled to gain weight for a role? Gwyneth Paltrow, on behalf of women across America: I HATE YOU.

• A conversation between Lisa and her almost 5-year-old son:

         Lisa: How was school today?

         Jack: Great. Aiden played a nazi in drama.

         Lisa: *WTF? Is nursery school secretly a cover for Hitler Youth?*       

         Lisa: A what?

         Jack: A nazi.

         Lisa: So what did the nazi do exactly?

         Jack: He took the other animal's food. I was a zebra.

         Lisa: So the nazi is an animal?

         Jack: Yup.

         Lisa: I think you might have the name wrong. Was it maybe a hyena?

         Jack: MOM! No, it was a nazi. The spider.

         Lisa: Wait, you mean Anansi the Spider?

         Jack: Yeah, a nazi.

         Lisa: Right. Maybe call him Anansi the Spider in the future, ok?

• Why don't we have a mailing list? WTF? Every awesome debut author has a mailing list so they can send their friends information about book covers, appearances, giveaways and other awesomeness. How have we overlooked this crucial marketing task? Er, um, would you guys like want to be on our mailing list? We promise NEVER to give your e-mail address to anyone else and we'll only send you really important updates. So, pretty pretty please click here and sign up ok? Cause if you don't we'll totally be the only uncool authors on the planet without a stellar e-mail campaign. [You see what we did there? We used the exact same tone in that last line that we used when trying to convince our mom to buy us matching Guess Jean skirts. She was unable to resist. We trust it will work just as well on you.]

So, what's your WTF moment this week? You know you've got one (or five). Do share in the comments.

*Just to clarify for our Grandma who reads the blog on a daily basis, WTF stands for "Why the face?" Seriously. It's nothing more sinister than that. We got it from Modern Family.**
**I think every post we write should now have a footnote. Because footnotes = fun. It's like writing my term papers for English Lit all over again and anything we can do to make our blog more like an English term paper has got to be good marketing, right? Right.

Shiloh vs. Zahara*

Okay, if you have no idea what the title of this post means and if you don't recognize the adorable kids pictured above, you should probably just stop reading now. The five minutes you'll spend reading this inanity are five minutes you'll never get back. Trust me.

For those of you who are on a first-name basis with the Jolie-Pitt brood, please check out this recent "news" item on UsMagazine.com, Which Jolie-Pitt Has the Best Style: Shiloh or Zahara?

A few things here:

1. The writer who pitched and then wrote this idea pretty much reserved themselves a spot in Hades. I mean these kids are three and four years old! Do you really need to be pitting them against each other like mini-CW starlets?

2. Who actually takes the time to comment on "news" articles like this? Okay, so I'm totally guilty of serial blog commenting, but at least that's reserved for people I sort of know. I can't imagine having something so burning to say about the Jolie-Pitt kids that I'd actually feel compelled to share my thoughts with fellow US Magazine junkies.

Which brings me to my third and final point....

3. The comments are BY FAR the most entertaining part of this whole affair. Some of our favorites:

• From SKHG, (who may or may not be Roy Ashburn secretly commenting on his iPhone from an Abercrombie dressing room.) "I really hope Shiloh's not part of their plan to help the gays. I wouldn't doubt it one bit! They seem to be pushing something that started out as cute and funny. Being the strange people they are, I guess anything's possible." [LiLa commentary: Laura - Who says "gays" in a non-ironic context? Lisa - Bat shit crazy people.]

• From B, "Is anyone else concerned about Shiloh? Why does she look like a boy?!?" [LiLa commentary: In a word: yes. We are concerned about Shiloh, B. But not concerned enough to leave a comment about it on UsMagazine.com. Oh no...we'll post an entire blog about it instead. Yeah, we like to take the high road.]

• From Real, "whats with all you people downing on a girl who doesnt need to be girly? I think her hair is a refreshing change. there are too many long locked mini princesses already." [LiLa commentary: We hear ya, Real. It does seem a little bit excessive, no? Although, I've got a three-year-old and she really isn't capable of deciding her own style just yet. In fact, I dress her like I would like to dress myself if I were two feet tall and under 30 pounds. Something tells me there might be a little bit of that going on here.]

• From They Are Both Prettier Than Maniston Ever Was, "To the Maniston weirdo who is bashing St. Angelina's kids - Maniston was never a cute kid. Her own mother wrote a book about how fugly she was growing up. Angie's kids are all beautiful." [LiLa commentary: Wow. Who knew people still really cared about the whole Jen vs. Angelina thing. I mean, no offense TABPTMEW, but isn't that whole debate so 2005? I mean, clearly Angelina won the battle, she got the guy and the career. Poor Jen has really amazing hair but hasn't been in a decent flick since her marriage collapsed. I think the whole "Maniston" nickname might be a little excessive. Why kick a girl when she's down?]

Well, there's your weekly dose of pop culture. Personally, as writers, we're SUPER excited for the inevitable tell-all books that will be published by these two in twenty years. I'll be first in line to pick up a copy of CONFUSED: MY LIFE DRESSED AS A SMALL PREPUBESCENT BOY by Shiloh Jolie-Pitt, although I'll be even more excited to read DADDY DEAREST: MY LIFE WITH A MAN WHO HATED WIRE HANGERS MORE THAN MY MOTHER HATED MANISTON by Zahara Jolie-Pitt.

Good times.

*Please note this post may be considered offensive if you are sensitive to tomboy preschoolers, anti-gay senators or if you are a frequent Abercrombie and Fitch shopper and a card carrying member of Team (M)Aniston.

Yeah, I'm Sensitive, So Sue Me

It occurred to me yesterday as I sat weeping on my couch folding laundry that I might be a little bit more emotional than the average gal. Maybe I should back up here and give you guys a little background.

It all started with a rather innocuous comment from my husband.

What my husband actually said: "Wow, it's getting hard for me to work around your schedule these days."
What Lisa heard: "You are not a good mother. Your time is not important. Your writing sucks. I think we should get a divorce."

Yeah, I'm slightly dramatic. Deal with it.

The thing is, writers are a sensitive breed. I guess that's part of our genius. We process feelings a little bit differently than the average person and *ahem* some of us are blessed with an extraordinary flair for drama.

I think this makes it particularly hard for us to accept constructive feedback from readers, agents and editors. For example:

Reader says: "I don't really understand this character's motivation. Maybe you should add some backstory?"
Writer hears: "Your writing sucks. Your characters suck. You shouldn't be writing anything more challenging than an e-mail."

Learning how to process feedback is probably one of the most important elements of becoming a successful writer. We all need to learn to take a step back and really hear what our readers our saying. This is one reason it's probably best to ask your beta readers to provide any notes or feedback in writing. After all, it's ok if you want to weep on the couch for a little while, just make sure you eventually force yourself out of the fetal position and really process that critique. Your writing (and maybe even your significant other) will thank me.

So, how do you guys handle tough critiques? Any advice for keeping those writerly emotions in check? Tell us everything in the comments.

Pay It Forward: Send Weronika to NYC!

GOAL MET!!! Thank you everyone for your donations! What an amazing group of friends and writers we have out there!

Ok, Little Ms. J has officially outdone herself. She's taken it upon herself to raise money for the soon-to-be-future-publishing-rockstar Weronika Janczuk to go to the Backspace Conference in NYC. Now many of you already know Weronika so you won't be surprised to hear that she's earned herself a scholarship (She's a genius. Seriously.), but she's in high school (Yeah, I know. Try not to hate her for being this genius at the wee age of 18) so actually getting to the city is going to be difficult for her financially.

The goal? $600

Your mission? Shout. Please link, Twitter, Facebook and blog about our mission to send Weronika to New York.

The ask? Give. Enter your email address in the comments section or email LMJ directly with the amount you would like to contribute toward Weronika's trip. She'll then arrange for your donation through Paypal.

The reward? LMJ is starting things off by donating $100. AND she'll chip in an additional $10 for every person who donates until we hit $600.

We've already made our donation and if you can afford to donate even $10 you'd be helping a fellow aspiring author out. Let's send Weronika to NYC!

P.S.
For anyone who comments on this blog post with the intention to donate to The Send Weronika to NYC Fund we'll enter your name into a raffle to win a custom "I Am The Fourth Roecker Sister" t-shirt AND a copy of one of our favorite books, The Body Finder. Just our way of saying thank you!

Top 5 Things We Learned This Week

Oh, it's been way too long since we've shared our random learnings with you, and let me tell you this week has been a doozy.

1. Young Adult Authors are truly amazing people. We had a couple of best selling authors reply to our blatant fangirl behavior by sending us truly incredible e-mails thanking us for our support and (gasp) agreeing to send us a signed copy of their book to give away. Details will be coming soon, but I just have to say it's pretty awesome to play even a small part in the writing community. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.

2. She likes it, she really likes it! As you all know, we had a rocky start with LIAR SOCIETY 2, but a couple of weeks ago we finally cracked the plot and wrote the most amazing outline ever. And yes, I'm saying that because I wrote it and also because no one gets poisoned by Diet Coke in this version.

Anyways, after our favorite beta ninja took a crack at the first five chapters and had little to complain about (which NEVER happens, so we were pretty pumped) we decided it was ready for a little something called "the mean agent treatment." Yes, that's what the amazing Major Agent (said in your best Victoria Beckham accent) calls it when she rips into one of our manuscripts.

But guess what?

This time she gushed. Okay, okay, we all know Major Agent doesn't gush, but she practically gushed which might as well be gushing. So, it's onward and upward for LIAR SOCIETY 2.

[Insert chest bump or the celebratory gesture of your choice here.]

3. Brittany from Glee is the light of my life. She's seriously the best character on TV right now. Blonde, dumb and lovable, Brittany has uttered some of the best lines on the show such as:

"When I pulled my hamstring I went to a misogynist."
"Did you know that dolphins are just gay sharks?"
Mr. Schue: "Who can tell me what a ballad is?" Brittany:"A male duck."

I think she might single handedly redeem dumb blonde chicks named Brittany. She's a national treasure, y'all.

4. Women across America (err...maybe just in LA?) are getting vajazzled thanks to a washed up Ghost Whisperer. Um, yeah. I don't really want to go into details here, but J. Love (not to be confused with J. Lo) has a book and apparently there's an entire chapter devoted to vajazzling. Her impact on the American culture is dizzying. First the Hanes ads and now this. We're 99% sure this is yet another sign of the apocalypse, so do yourself a favor and watch out for four dudes on horses. You're welcome.

5. When you're down and troubled and you need a helping hand, just blog or Tweet or Facebook me. We all have difficult weeks as writers. The weeks spent waiting or the weeks where you get a rejection that totally knocks you on your ass. But every time we ever hit a rough patch all of you guys are here to cheer us up and you don't even realize you're doing it. Every comment, every @reply, every new friend gives us a little thrill. So, thank you for being there for us throughout this crazy journey to publication. We couldn't do it without you guys.

[Insert picture of LiLa with single tears running down their cheeks here.]

Have a fab weekend everyone! Can't wait to see what next week brings!

Finding 10,000 Fans or How to Drive Yourself Completely Insane

Dawn Metcalf is a fellow Elevensie and her debut YA novel, SKIN & BONES is due out in Spring 2011 by Dutton Books. She's also completely insane.

Well, maybe we should back up a little bit. Over the past year or so Dawn has been painstakingly creating a list of readers who would be interested in reading SKIN & BONES. So far she has 7,000 e-mail addresses and she's not stopping until she has 10,000.

Holy. Crap.

As you can imagine, little publicity whores that we are, as soon as we heard about Dawn's insane quest we had about a million (ok, five) questions.

LiLa: We can't believe you've got e-mail addresses for over 7,000 people who would want to read your book. We're green with envy and more than anything else we want to know HOW you've done it.

Dawn: You presume much, young Skywalkers -- I'm *hoping* that I've found 7000 people who will *most likely* want to buy my book. Who knows? But anything's better than nothing, right?  ;-)

Let's just say that this was Something To Do instead of biting my fingernails to the quick while waiting for the publishing Godot to ping me back.  ((shudder))

LiLa: That publishing Godot is a bitch. So, how did this all start?

Dawn: As a flippant remark. Now there's an auspicious start! The "marketing guru" from a previous agency was explaining to me what I could do as an author to promote myself and prove to the folks at my publishing house's acquisitions meeting that I was willing to do the work and had a book worth backing. Well, I was certainly willing to do that...but how? I was bouncing off ideas when she said with a chuckle, "Well, it's not like you could go in there with 10,000 emails of people willing to buy your book." I said, "Done."

Gauntlet issued. Gauntlet thrown. I wanted to see if I could.

LiLa: Wow. Where did you even begin and how the hell did you find all these e-mail addresses?

Dawn: Well, first I did the obvious thing: listed family and friends. You know, I honestly thought I was a lot more popular than that... Ah, well. So next I thought of places I had personal connections: work, school, my local library, my local bookseller, my religious community, my karate community -- places that knew me and had folks who might buy my book because it was mine. Then I looked to my writing communities: critique partners, organizations, blog groups and author hangouts and thought about the people who I knew best and who might read my book because they'd been with me for the ride.

This still left a long way to go.

Then I got a little more creative and a little more specific. My book is a paranormal fantasy with a latina protagonist whose powers were based loosely on the Mexican holiday, Dia de los Muertos, and prominently featured skulls. I started looking for latina youth readerships, genre readers who liked myths and ethnic cultures, fans of paranormal fantasy books that were similar to mine...there are A LOT of interest groups out there and that's where I found *a ton* of phenomenal people and enthusiastic readers, reviewers, bloggers and artists. Many went on my list, some became new online friends, a lot of research ended up nowhere. It's been a sort of hobby in-between the writing projects and I haven't grown tired of the scavenger hunt yet!

For example, my favorite find was from *years* ago when I stumbled across an art project, Skull-A-Day, [http://skulladay.blogspot.com] which featured a piece of inspired "skull art" every day for a year (then two, then three...). I remembered it, contacted Noah Scalin about my upcoming book, and he agreed to promote it on his site. I was thrilled! I love his stuff and can't wait to be a part of that magic! He has 1000+ fans listed on his site via Google Connect, 100+ on Twitter, 1000+ on Facebook; *someone* who loved Scalin's book, SKULLS, might enjoy my book, too. (BTW, I don't count any of these fans towards my 10,000 goal.)

LiLa: We have the biggest girl crush on you right now, you have no idea. What are you going to do once you've got 10,000?

Dawn: I'm gonna do my Happy Dance and then add the Excel spreadsheet to my promotional bag of tricks.

LiLa: Solid plan. Have you told your editor about all this insanity yet?

Dawn: Well, since she's admitted that she follows me online, I guess she knows about it now! (No, seriously, I told her about this a while ago. She said that I was crazy, but respected it.)

LiLa: What tips would you have for other authors who want to try to do this same thing?

Dawn: First, check with your doctor or Significant Other to see if you're certifiable. Oops! I forgot: you're a writer -- same thing, right? So: remember that query letter way back when? Remember your hook, your pitch, and that line about the "fans of X and Y" who would probably like your book? After writing down your family, friends and co-workers, go there. Think of who your book might appeal to and ferret them out. Ask yourself who are my characters or where is the setting or what is the genre audience that you are trying to reach? What makes your book stand out? What makes it similar to other great books out there? See who is following those authors or who has taken the time to review them on B&N, Borders, Amazon or Goodreads. Who lists these on Shelfari or JacketFlap? Know your book bloggers? There are great folks out there! Do a search for comments on Twitter, Livejournal or Blogger. Has anyone posted a contest? Has anyone created fan art? Written fanfic? Joined a fanlist? These are the people who were moved enough to tell *other* people about a book or be inspired by it. Those are the people I want to know about my book when it comes out.

Let me add that I did not buy any "lists" or hire someone overseas or program a spider bot to do this for me. I hand-picked each and every person on my list as someone who I thought might be open and willing to hear about, purchase and/or recommend my book. I clicked on their website, browsed their blog, read their bio or favorites list or really loved their art. I also did not take any emails from those who posted that they don't want "spam" or hid their emails or used a pseudonom or other obvious privacy settings; these folks don't want to be contacted and I respect that. BUT if a rabid fan wants to share their love of X, Y or Z with the world, then I'm right with them! They might like my stuff, too. When I contact them, I want to be sure that they know that this is from ME. They are my personal favorite 10,000 could-be fans and I want to treat them with the respect and good humor.

***

Ok, so how cool is that? What do you guys think? Are there 10,000 people out there who would be interested in buying your book? Think you can find 'em? Sound off in the comments and let us know if you have any follow-up questions for Dawn.

P.S. Don't forget to follow Dawn on Twitter and friend her on Facebook!

Gimme a Call: Advice for LiLa from LiLa

Have you guys been following #gimmeacall on Twitter? It's awesome. Go check it out if you haven't already and definitely order Sarah Mylanowski's book by the same name.

Here's what we'd have to say if we got a call from our high school selves:

• Wait until college to find a boyfriend. "Dating" in highschool consists of being the designated driver after watching your "boyfriend" shotgun beers.
• ROCK that bikini. You look hot and being self conscious is SO last season.
• Make-out with lots of boys. Seriously. Kissing is fun!
• When your lab partner passes you a note professing his love, be nice. In 10 years he'll come out of the closet.
• What are you so afraid of? People laughing at you? Here's a tip: Laugh first.
• Pay more attention in history. It's actually kind of cool.
• Take care of your sisters. They'll always be your best friends.
• Mixing gin and Diet Coke is a terrible idea.
• Just say no to purple hair dye. The prom pictures will haunt you.
• Up-do's are almost never a good idea.
• Outdoor parties are always the most fun.
• Save your mix tapes. They rock.
• Why are you so afraid to dance? Just break it down. No one's really watching you anyways
• Eat whatever you want. It will be years before it catches up to you.
• Be nicer to Mom and Dad. They only seem to suck because they love you.
• If you don't agree with someone, say it. Don't be so afraid to speak up.
• Be confident. And if you're not, fake it.
• Make eye contact. No one gets anywhere staring at the ceiling.
• Spend as much time as possible with your girlfriends. Some of them will be in your wedding.
• Actually apply for those scholarships Mom won't shut up about. Student loans blow.
• Learn how to play golf.
• It's okay to be a nerd. Seriously. Own it. Embrace it. Being cool is boring.
• Challenge people in the summers to move up the tennis ladder. It will make Dad happy.
• Get your eyebrows waxed--you cannot be trusted with a pair of tweezers.
• Don't cut all of your hair off on a dare. You'll thank me later.
• Pay attention. Some day you'll be writing about this stuff.

So...what advice would you have for your high school self? Advise away in the comments.

Masters of the Universe

After some intense sisterly debate (arm wrestling included, of course) we have officially drafted an open letter to the Universe:

Dear Universe,

First and foremost, we love your work. I mean, our lives? Pretty awesome. Also we're really excited about the Madonna centric Glee episode tonight and something tells me we have you to thank for that. Well played.

Anywho, you might have heard rumors about us wanting to strike a deal in regards to forcing encouraging 1,000 people to follow our random little blog in 2010. I think even you can appreciate all of the round numbers at play here, right? It just feels right.

So, if you can arrange for us to score 1,000 Followers BEFORE January 1, 2011 we will record a little something we're referring to as the LiLa Olympics. It's sort of a cross between the Beer Olympics and a really budget beauty pageant. Here's how it's going to go down:

• There will be four events including Talent, Evening Wear, Trivia and a Dance-off.
• There will be a minimum of three judges, most of which will probably be related to us in some way, shape or form.
• The entire competition will be recorded and posted on this blog for the entertainment of our loyal followers.

Universe, we feel this deal is more than fair. I mean, we're pretty much willing to humiliate ourselves in a quasi-public forum in exchange for people clicking a tiny little button on our blog. 

We anxiously await your reply.

Kisses,

L&L

P.S.
Thanks to 74 AMAZING blog readers we are donating all of these books to our local libraries. You guys rock!

D-Bag-O-Meter: Matthew McConaughey

Oh, Matthew, where do we even begin? We have so many questions for you after watching your borderline unintelligible interview with Rachel Ray. The first of which is why the hell didn't one of the producers add subtitles? Although to be fair, I might mumble if I had to talk to Rachel Ray too. I mean, she's just so freaking perky.



Anyways, questions, we have lots. So it's probably best that we just get them all out on the table, yes?

1. Do you want to punch Rachel in the face when she says EVOO? (Sorry, I know it's off topic, but it's pertinent. I think the D-Bag-O-Meter might even show some leniency if the answer here was a yes...)

2. Um, sunglasses in an interview? Really?

3. A bedazzled beret??? COME ON! Might as well just rope a matching marf (man scarf) around your neck and call it a day.

4. The shout out to your wife who just popped out one of your babies by confusedly looking from camera to camera and then putting your arms up in the air and shouting "Camilla you're the champion!" Um...dude, no. Just no. If I was at home lactating while my husband gave me a seemingly-drug-addled shout out on national television there would be some serious hell to pay.

5. No changing diapers? I mean, at least pretend you change diapers. Throw us a bone here, Matthew. We want to like you. Really we do. But you spend an inordinate amount of time with your shirt off and you just don't strike us as an exceptionally responsible parent.

So...what's the verdict D-Bag-O-Meter? All right, all right, all right, Matthew. You know what I hate about these immature movie stars, man? They get older, they have kids, but mentally they stay the same age. Matthew, put your shirt on, ditch the sunglasses and change a freaking diaper if you want out of the Spencer zone.

Kisses and bong rips,
L&L