SNL and Jon Hamm

I kind of wish Jon Hamm hosted SNL every single week. He's hot and hilarious. Sort of the perfect combination, right?

These were my two favorite skits of the night. Randomness at its finest.

A Friday Funk

It's Friday and I'm in a nasty mood. TGIF? More like TGTWIFO (Thank God This Week Is Freaking OVER). Yeah, it's just been one of those weeks. But all is not lost. There were five things that made me happy this week:

1. Our review of SAVING CEECEE HONEYCUTT is featured on the front page of the Teen Fire Ning. What's that you say? You're not a member of Sourcebooks' Teen Fire Ning? Um...not to be rude or anything, but what are you waiting for? Our fabulous publisher has put together a killer social networking site for all of you YA lovers out there. Join us!

2. I read CATCHING FIRE. Yeah, I admit I've had the book sitting on my shelf forever. I knew I was going to love it and I knew I'd be sad when it ends knowing that I'll have to wait more than 6 months for the final book in the series. And the book did not disappoint. Suzanne Collins is a genius. Seriously.

3. I'm pretty sure Apple might have just saved the future of publishing. iBooks? Can Steve Jobs make reading cool again? I think yes. Nerds across the world rejoice and start saving up for the (unfortunately named) iPad. But don't take our word for it, check out what the experts are saying.

4. The fabulous Melissa posted an interview with us on her blog. As if the interview wasn't exciting enough we got some of the nicest comments ever. Melissa has some great readers! Those comments were the highlight of my week. Seriously.

5. Twilight is finally on cable. That's right bitches Showtime is playing Twilight in HD and I've got it on my TiVo. You know what that means, right? Laura and I are having a Twilight party at my house. There will be Twizzlers, cheap white wine from Target and SPARKLES. I've also got Lifetime's The Pregnancy Pact cued up, so we could even make it a double feature. Maybe I can talk Laura into a sleepover next Wednesday...

Have a great weekend everyone!

Book Review: SOME GIRLS ARE by Courtney Summers

I brought SOME GIRLS ARE with me on the plane to Chicago this weekend thinking that I'd read a few chapters on my way home and then take a little nap on the plane. Let's just say the nap never happened.

Here's the book description from Amazon:

Climbing to the top of the social ladder is hard--falling from it is even harder. Regina Afton used to be a member of the Fearsome Fivesome, an all-girl clique both feared and revered by the students at Hallowell High... until vicious rumors about her and her best friend's boyfriend start going around. Now Regina's been "frozen out" and her ex-best friends are out for revenge. If Regina was guilty, it would be one thing, but the rumors are far from the terrifying truth and the bullying is getting more intense by the day. She takes solace in the company of Michael Hayden, a misfit with a tragic past who she herself used to bully. Friendship doesn't come easily for these onetime enemies, and as Regina works hard to make amends for her past, she realizes Michael could be more than just a friend... if threats from the Fearsome Foursome don't break them both first.

This book was riveting. I literally could not put it down. Regina is an intense character and easily could have been unlikeable or difficult to relate to in the hands of a lesser writer. But Summers nails her voice and I found myself cheering for Regina as I watched her grow and develop throughout the course of the story. The writing is superb and the pacing is fantastic.

Go pick up your copy today. You won't regret it.

The High Fashion Haiku

Took a little break from the rhymes and tried my hand at a few Haikus*. No, they are not about nature.

Open-toe, boot shoes
80s frames, signature scowl
let’s go to the beach.

Jutting collar bones
extending down the middle
I die, Rachel Zoe.

Early morning walk
torn men’s button down, black sneaks
added 50 years.

Pillows whilst traveling
okay if you’re under ten
not for twenty plus.

Yes, you rock the curves
but not a spandex onesie
another bad choice.


Oh dictionary
please paste this under d-bag
move over Gosselin.

*And yes, I might be practicing for this. I mean, they're having these contests once a week and it's like they were created for me, right?

Tell the Truth Tuesday...

1. I'm totally reading the copy of Gentlemen Prefer Succubi that we're giving away. Sorry Simply Stacie! Hope you don't mind very gently used books. Send us an e-mail with your address and we'll mail the books in a week or so because there's no way I'm sending them without finishing. I haven't read anything this steamy since, um, ever.

2. We have another Vlog in the works wherein I'm going to kick LMJ's ass in Pop Culture Trivial Pursuit. Yeah, this isn't exactly a deep dark secret, but I'm really, really good at Pop Culture Trivial Pursuit. My family refuses to even play with me.

3. I've officially added The Buried Life and My Life as Liz to my already bloated TiVo. The Buried Life is good TV. What's not to like about cute teenage boys in driving around in an RV checking things off their bucket list? Think Jackass meets Pay it Forward. And My Life as Liz is an entertaining look at the high school caste system. Required viewing for all wannabe YA writers.

4. We're going in...Again. That's right. It's time for us to start a new project. Pemberly Brown #2 here we come.

5. I'm on the lazy girl's diet. Our kitchen refrigerator broke a couple of weeks ago and the replacement is finally being delivered today. We have this really old , crappy refrigerator in the storage room in our basement, but I'm terrified of going in there. As a result we've been living off of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and popcorn. My kids probably have scurvy.

Now it's your turn. What's your truth this Tuesday?

Ask LiLa: First Chapter-itis

This week we've got a question from crafty Kerri at CK Farm:


Ok here is my question Lisa and Laura. Are you ready? You threatened it out of me, lol!


Topic: First chapter woes


I have done my first chapter over several times and was wondering if this tells me something about my story or am I just obsessing to get that hook, line, and sinker. Any advice to get that first chapter perfected would be nice! I hate to think it would send me into a bag of twizzlers stress eating!


Warmest regards,
Kerri C at CK Farm AKA Kerri C at the funny farm!


Oh Kerri, we have been there, my friend. I can't even tell you how many times we've rewritten the first chapter of Pemberly Brown. In fact, we've rewritten the first chapter of all of our manuscripts approximately a bazillion times.


First chapters are critical because agents, editors and readers decide whether or not to read the entire manuscript within a few paragraphs. No pressure or anything.


But don't panic because we have a full proof system for perfect first chapters:


1. Avoid cliches. Confirm that you aren't opening your manuscript with one of these tired cliches. Sure writers get away with this stuff all the time, but why risk it?


2. Conflict is key. One of the easiest ways to engage your reader is to make sure the central conflict of the manuscript is clearly described within the first chapter. It's really hard to hook your reader without conflict.


3. Start at the beginning. Um, duh. This seems kind of obvious, but make sure your first chapter starts where your story actually begins. Don't start with an infodump or backstory.


4. Get a second opinion. And a third, and a fourth and a fifth, uh yeah, you get the idea. The more people you have read your first chapter, the better. Brave enough to hear the answer to "Are you hooked?" Then enter one of MSFV's Secret Agent contests. This is a great way to get feedback from other talented writers and a literary agent.


5. Take the leap. Eventually you're going to have to take a leap of faith and send out your manuscript. Whether you're sending queries to agents or sending a new manuscript to your editor it can be hard to let go and stop tinkering. But in the words of the immortal Demi Moore in the cinematic masterpiece Indecent Proposal, when you love something you've got to set it free. Well, something like that anyways.


Hope this helps a little bit Kerri. First pages are a bitch!


XOXO,
L&L

What Judy Taught Me

Last Sunday I got the news that my friend and mentor passed away. Judy will be missed by a lot of people for a lot of different reasons, but here are the five reasons I'll miss her most.

1. Judy led by example. Judy was a living legend. By the time I started at the company she had already been there for 30 years, served on the board of directors, and founded their women in leadership group. She had a reputation for being tough, difficult even. And the first time we met in the bathroom she told me I looked like I was in between classes at college. I was silly enough to take it as a compliment at the time.

It wasn't.

But when we started working together it was magic. Judy knew how to bring out the best in people because she led by example. I learned more from watching her sell one client than I had in my five previous years with the company.

2. Judy taught me that appearance counts. And not just physical appearance, but the way you market yourself to the world. Every e-mail, every menial task, every tedious meeting was an opportunity to demonstrate my value and kick some corporate ass.

3. Judy showed me the importance of being passionate. Judy never did anything half ass. If she was professionally or personally invested in something she was ALL over it. Her enthusiasm was contagious and that's probably why she made such an amazing leader. Judy taught me that when you are passionate you invoke passion in others.

4. Judy helped me find my voice. I didn't even know what voice was back then, but when I sent her my first draft of a newsletter for our team she sent it back and said, "Boring! Where is your signature Lisa style?" Judy had picked up on my voice from more casual communications and she taught me how to channel it and use it in everything that I write. Priceless.

5. Judy was the life of the party. I'll never forget being at some horrible corporate function and feeling someone sneak up behind me and whisper in my ear, "Your breasts look fantastic!" It was Judy, of course. One of her most memorable antics was taking clients to a Madonna concert wearing a hot pink satin bra on top of her conservative button down. Judy was always the life of the party and as a result people gravitated to her.

I always thought Judy was grooming me for a career in corporate America. I naturally assumed that she wanted me to follow in her distinguished footsteps. But looking back at everything I learned from her over the years, I think she was secretly teaching me how to be a writer.

The Succubus Diaries: Author interview and contests!

Today we've got an interview (and some extra special contests!) with the fabulous Jill Myles whose debut novels Gentlemen Prefer Succubi and Succubi Like It Hot are impossible to keep on the shelves (and not just because they're so steamy). I ended up having to order them from Amazon because all of our local bookstores were sold out!

Lucky for us, Jill is also working on a young adult novel and agreed to talk to us about the difference between writing smoking hot paranormal romance and YA.

LiLa: Gentlemen Prefer Succubi (click here to read the first chapter) follows Jackie Brighton after a dark stranger's bite transforms her into an immortal siren with a seductive itch. Not exactly PG...I'm assuming your YA is somewhat different.

Jill: Yes! My YA is about a girl in an alternate United States who can turn invisible, and keeps it a secret. But the government finds out and whisks her away to a secret compound which is a school for 'augmented' kids. It's about her trying to figure out her place in the world when the world is definitely not what it seems to be. It's very 'coming of age'. We'll be shopping it (hopefully) in January, so cross your fingers for me!

LiLa: Sounds like a ton of fun! So, why did you decide to try your hand at YA? Did you know right away that the story was young adult or did that become clear after you'd already started?

Jill: I actually didn't start out writing the book as a YA! I wrote the book and it involved a 24-year-old who'd been whisked away to a school of super-powered teenagers, and she was the oldest one there. And I sent it around to my beta readers and everyone liked it, but they all said it was missing something. No one knew what. And then the YA market really started to boom and I wondered if I had a YA on my hands instead. I sent it to my agent (who had quite a few YA sales) and asked her if it was something that would be better off as YA. She more or less said "Duh" (hee) and so I basically rewrote the story from the viewpoint of a teenager. It works much better now. I just love the book so much and I've rewritten it easily a dozen times trying to make it "right".

LiLa: Voice is so important in young adult lit, it's impressive that you were willing to put in the time to get it just right. Was your process any different writing for teens versus writing for adults?

Jill: Well, yes! I pretty much did it all wrong! I basically had to start over when changing the story to YA. Rewrote a ton of stuff. And then I had to rewrite it over and over again (and OVER AGAIN) because I continued to add adult things in. My radar was set to 'adult' stuff so it was hard for me to get character reactions just right. For example, I had one guy in the story that was very cocky, and swaggery and alpha. Which is great when you are writing adult romance, but in a YA, he came across as...an ass. Unlikeable. So I had to sit down and really think his personality through and what had shaped him, and had to basically "backpedal". Sure, he was swaggery as an adult, but would he be the same at sixteen?

Did I mention it involved lots and lots of rewriting? ;)

LiLa: I love that you took a fully developed adult character and imagined him as 16. We'll have to remember that trick! Is the voice in your YA similar at all to the voice in The Succubus Diaries?

Jill: Yes and no. I think pretty much everything I write has a similar 'tone' to it, but my YA has a different narrator, so she sounds different than my adult heroine. She's less flip and a little more vulnerable and secretive. But I still think you could pick it up and get that it's a Jill Myles book, if that makes sense.

LiLa: That makes perfect sense! Do you think it will be easier to sell a YA novel than it was to sell the books you've written for adults?

Jill: Well, yes and no! There are so many factors that come into play when selling each individual book. I mean, if my adult book somehow takes off and hits the bestseller list (excuse me while I giggle to myself at the thought) and stays there for like, a dozen weeks...then I do think it'll be easy. Who doesn't want a piece of the next bestseller, right? But on the other hand, if it sinks like a stone, it'll be a lot harder for me to sell anything else (YA or otherwise) because I'll have a failed book on my record.

But I don't know that it'll be 'easier' to sell a YA novel because it still depends on the novel, you know? What if every YA line has already bought up similar stories? What if my voice is all wrong? There are so many factors - and not to mention the fact that everyone is shopping YA right now because it's so popular. So easy? I don't know about that. :)

LiLa: Yeah, so that's totally terrifying. Let us never speak of debuts sinking like stones ever again. Rumor has it Gentlemen Prefer Succubi is pretty steamy. Do you have sex scenes in your YA? Did you approach them differently when writing for a younger audience?

Jill: Gentlemen is very steamy! I think it's because of the subject matter (a succubus). And no, there are no sex scenes in my YA (which is another reason why it seemed to confound everyone). I wrote the story and sex didn't seem to be on my heroine's mind, so sex didn't come up. There is a kiss, though! And I don't know if it's more or less steamy kiss than an adult one. The scenario in which it happens is a little more innocent than the scenarios that my succubus normally gets into, so there's a bit of a difference there.

LiLa: I can't wait to read all of these kissing scenes. They can be so hard to write for prudes like us! Will you use a pen name for your young adult work or are you hoping to stick with Jill Myles?

Jill: Whichever the publisher prefers. Jill Myles is a pseudonym as well, so I'm happy to go with whatever name they prefer for me to use. I wouldn't mind keeping Jill Myles, but I totally understand if it gets contracted and a publisher decides that they don't want the audience crossing over. Wouldn't blame them! :)

Now cross your fingers for me and hope it sells!

LiLa: Fingers officially crossed.

And now for the contests!

• If you comment on this post, you'll be entered to win a copy of Gentlemen Prefer Succubi and Succubi Like It Hot. Laura and I will post the winner on Monday, January 25th.

• And even better, Jill is hosting a contest to win a personalized query critique from her agent Holly Root! For more entries in this contest, comment on the other blog tour posts (a full list of participating blogs and a schedule can be found at Market my Words). You can earn one entry per blog per comment. Winner will be chosen at random by Jill Myles and announced on her blog on Wednesday, January 27th along with an interview with Holly.

Next stop on the tour: Tomorrow Marissa Burt is going to be talking Jill about what inspires her to write.

Waxing Poetic Wednesday

It's shaping up to be artifacts week in LiLa land. Turns out the Regulator has been a-regulating--mainly in the form of threatening to trash all of our old junk unless we dump it in our own basements. Thankfully I dug through my pile before she incinerated it because beneath my old yearbooks, ratty-looking stuffed animals and piles of bent birthday cards, I pulled out Laura Roecker's Writing Folder.

Duh duh duh.

Here's my dirty little secret. I used to write poems. Lots of them. In the margins of my notebooks, in random journals, on my mom's stationary. Everywhere. They were angsty, severely depressing, mildly alarming poems. The kind of crap Dr. Seuss would write if he were clinically depressed and going through puberty. Back when I was 15 I considered them art, but these days their primary purpose is to entertain.

This poem was written in 7th grade. And yes, it rhymes.

Editorial Note: Since I do not have access to a scanner, I have maintained authentic spelling/punctuation. It's funnier that way.

Untitled by Laura Roecker

What was going through your mind?

How could you do a thing of this kind?

Do you understand taht you have no friends?

Beleive me Jenn this is the end.

Through all the memories we have shared

I actually thought you really cared

But now I know, what I should of known before

You are not my friend, your just a horror

Do you know what a friendship means?

Obviously not for all I have seen

I've seen the hate in your heart

Which I actually saw from the start

Well, through all that us friends

have been through

I have to say, Jenn I hate you!

Your a backstabbing, self centered, no good, selfish, lowdown, freakin bitch friend*

What was the message you were trying to send?

You hurt everyone and now it is our turn

and you really have a huge lesson to learn.

Who knows, you will probably do this again!

And to think these fights are all over men?!

Who are you to say that I am at fault

You come off as if your in a cult!

Go away, leave me alone

don't talk to me, or call me on the phone

You are not my friend, that it is all.

I will not help you when you fall.

For, have you helped me?

Well, if you have, I can't see!

Good luck finding friends hopefully youll have something else to lend.

I was not helped when I fell, no longer will you be helped by me,
so Jenn Orlando**, please Go to Hell!

*All-time favorite part. I had originally written bitch, but scratched it out and wrote friend above it.
**Name changed to protect the innocent.

***Ironically, this particular poem was written on stationary that features a butterfly and flower with the quote, "You are quite remarkable! You take it all in stride." There doesn't appear to be a whole lot of taking it in stride going on here.

There's more where this came from. Get excited.

Mike Roecker Memorabilia

My first memory of reading is with my dad. I was probably in kindergarten at the time and we were sitting on this God-awful navy blue floral couch with The Cat In The Hat and I was bound and determined to read the book myself.

There was always something magical about my dad reading out loud to me; the way his voice could make the tiny black words typed across the page come alive. And I was greedy. I wanted it for myself.

That night a reader was born.

Once I began reading, I never stopped and once I'd plowed through the sparse young adult section at our local library, I began raiding my parents' bookshelf. My parents let me read whatever I wanted and my dad was always up for a discussion after I was done.

But the very best thing about borrowing books from my dad were the treasures you'd find inside. My dad is known for using completely random things as bookmarks and when I loaned my brother-in-law my dad's books in Stephen King's Dark Tower series he dubbed them Mike Roecker Memorabilia. You just never know what you'll find in one of my dad's books.

The other night when I was at my parents' house flipping through some of our old books I found some truly random things including:

• Three of my dad's business cards (all for completely different jobs);
• Another business card for a Robert Hawkins at ITW Insert Businesses (Hi, Bob! Hope you don't have a google alert on your name);
• A blank United States Customs Declaration form;
• A daily behavior and work chart for family friend Kevin Hutchings (he's now in college) complete with tiny little stickers; and
• An Amazon.com bookmark from Summer 2001.

I also dug up a truly wretched snapshot of my engagement picture. Why anyone would have wanted this picture in wallet size is beyond me.

But my best find (by far) is this random little note:

After reading this I'm left with so many questions:

• Where was Laura going at 7:00 on Wed the 18th?
• Did she wear jeans?
• Who is Diana?
• Did she like Laura's jeans?
• Was a $350 portfolio required? (Note this part is in my dad's handwriting)
• Was it a pyramid scheme?
• Did Laura and Diana somehow get sucked in?

See, this is the stuff I'll miss if real books ever go away. Kindles don't need bookmarks and it's sort of fun when your book doubles as a time capsule.

Ask LiLa (Um, actually ask Joanna...): The Dreaded Synopsis

It's time for our second installment of Ask LiLa. This week we received a great question from Lexcade:

Hey ladies!

Just wondering if you have any advice on writing a killer synopsis. I've gone a number of different routes and just can't get the hang of it. Any insight would be awesome right now.

Thanks!
Lexcade

P.S. You should totally come down to Cinci for a weekend... just sayin'...[Editorial note: We are SO in. Cinci is driving distance from Cleveland and Laura and I have grand plans for some kind of road trip involving Frosties, audiobooks and (of course) Twizzlers.]

Sadly, Laura and I weren't even sure what the plural of synopsis is (synopsi? synopseses?), so we decided to consult an expert, and who better than über agent Joanna Stampfel-Volpe at Nancy Coffey Literary & Media Representation.

Here's what Joanna had to say:

Okay, here are synopses guidelines:

Unless an agent/editor states otherwise in their submission guidelines, synopses should be no more than 2 pages (1 page is always preferred).

Synopsis Basics:

2 pages
Size 12 font
1" margins
Title, Author, Word Count (at top)
Single-spaced
Double-space between paragraphs

Think of a synopsis like a book report--it can be boring! In fact, they usually are, and that's OK. A synopsis is just a fact-filled run down of your story.

• Only mention characters and plot points that are relevant to the larger story arch. You don't need to tell us every subplot. You don't need to tell us every character. In fact, a good rule of thumb is that if you can only think to mention a character once in your synopsis, then they shouldn't be there at all. Only characters that are integral to the beginning, middle, AND the end of the story.

• Always, always give away the end. None of this "She stepped to the ledge of the cliff and...you'll have to read the story to find out!" bull crap. We're professionals, and to make an educated decision, we need ALL of the pertinent facts.

• Agents view synopses as a tool. We don't consider them a representation of your ability to create an exciting story or beautiful prose. That's what your manuscript is for.

Now you can see why we have a HUGE girl crush on Joanna. And lucky for you, you can now stalk her on Twitter and, of course, query her by following the submission guidelines outlined on Publisher's Marketplace.

And don't forget if you have a question for LiLa e-mail us. Um, please? Because if we don't get questions we're going to have to start making them up and randomly attributing them to blog followers.

And yes, that is a threat.